A Nigerian man identified as Ab on Twitter has narrated the sad and shocking story of his life and it has caused quite a buzz on social media.
The 33-year-old man recounted how he discovered his wife was a serial cheat and that their two children are not biologically his.
Read his lengthy post below,
“My name is Ab and this is my story.
– I’m not a good writer so they’ll surely be mistakes as you read
– I’m not writing this to guilt trip or shade any one, I promise you.
– It’s going to be a long one.
– This is my story, no additives.
– This has been in my google doc for sometime, I keep updating it, waiting to be fully or close to being fully healed before I post it.
– I feel like I’ll be more relieved when so many people read my story, though I want to be as anonymous as I can, for the confidentiality of me or other people included in this story.
I’m Ab, a 33 year old man from a family of seven. Parents and five siblings (two girls and three boys), I’m the eldest.
I am very shy, reserved and anti social. I don’t have friends, not a single one, apart from the few buddies I used to play with in my street when I was much more younger, that we’re still talking till now.
When I say anti social, I’m talking about being anti social and even anti social media. I dedicate so much time to my work that I can go on for days without remembering to check my social media feeds.
I wasn’t from a rich home, we worked a lot before we ate. My parent worked very hard while I was growing up, be it in the farm or their endeavours, these guys worked extremely hard to make sure they raise us up as comfortably as they can. Sending us to the best verage schools et all.
My parents have the best and happiest marriage I’ve ever seen, till date, I’m 33 and I’ve never in my life seen those people quarrel before, not to talk of being verbal with each other, never.
My dad, married very late, he said he didn’t want to get married and raise a family he couldn’t be financially supportive. He married my mom when he was 49 and she was 20.
I graduated at age 22, from one of the Federal Universities in the Southwestern part of Nigeria. Started working at age 23 (an old pal my dad worked for as a cleaner when he was younger linked me with the job). At 25 I was doing very okay, to the extent I was the one in charge of all my younger siblings’ education (everything inclusive; rent, allowances and all)
I am not really a woman’s man, don’t get me wrong, I love women, I am always admiring them, but it is always from a far, I didn’t or don’t really like the idea of me being in a relationship or getting married, let me shock you? Well all through my schooling days, I never had a girl friend or been in a relationship, though at one point or the other I’ve done some things, you understand me.
One day my mom called me to come to the village that weekend unfailingly, she wants to see all of us, I went. In her words “Ab, I know you’re still young, but you have to consider getting married. Look at your dad, he is 74 with no grandchild, his age mates have grandchildren and some have great grandchildren, he has always told me in our alone time he wishes to see even one grandchild before God calls him, you have all the resources to get married, go and think about it, at least start something, be in a relationship, bring the girl, but this .isn’t pressure, so please take your time, as marriage is a forever stuff”.
I bought this, my mom was very right, my dad deserves it, my immediate younger sibling was my first sister, she was just 21 by then and still in the university, there was no way she was having a kid by then so it was me and just me. But like my mom said, I took my time, I wasn’t in a rush at all.
I met L, she was 21, she was in school by then, L was/is the most loving, caring, determined, adventurous, you name it, woman I’ve ever seen. We started dating after talking for sometime. Everything was going on very well and smooth and by 2016, on her POP(from NYSC) night I proposed to her and she said yes. You could see the happiness and excitement on her face. I was the happiest boy on earth. She was 23 and I was 27. The idea of making a family with this rare human was so exciting, damn.
One year later in 2017, we got married (she was pregnant for our first child already, though it wasn’t showing). She was 24 and me? 28. Our parents and families were so happy, this was “a match made in heaven” as my mom would always say, my sibling would always remind me of how lucky I am, to meet this kind of being. My baby boy, my dad was the happiest, because he was months away from having his first grandchild, at 78.
By 2019, we had our second child. And everyday was as if I’m just meeting this woman for the first time, life was sweet. My family was the best on earth, every day I couldn’t wait to just go home and meet my world, my family. My two boys loves me and I love them like there will be no tomorrow.
Oh before I forget, I took over from her parents, I sponsored my wife’s education from when we met till when she was done, put her two siblings on huge monthly allowances, though not too huge, so they wouldn’t become comfortable and start being too dependent. When she was done with school I opened up her dream business for her, and she’s thriving, till this day, she’s a multi millionaire.
2020, the lockdown year, was the year I would make sure didn’t happen, if I have any super powers. I started working from home, and I had more time to spend with my three angels. I never suspected my wife of cheating, matter of fact, the “What if” has never crossed my head, because, me myself, what’s cheating though?
When the lock down was eased, still working from home, we would go on road trips, all of us, including our boys. Long trips to different cities some times, some days we lodge over, some days we go back home. I didn’t like it, but my wife was a big fan of it, so why not? As long as she’ll be the one driving, I was good.
This particular day, in a particular city that was recommended by my wife (told me about how sweet and enjoyable the city was, that she’s seen some online reviews and her best friend even recommended it for her), after we’ve made the boys to sleep in their (hotel) room, she was telling me about a particular shawarma joint she saw online which was just like a 5 minute walk from the hotel, we decided to stroll over. We got it, and the waiter (or what do you call them?) that served us, gave me a note, I just stuck it inside my trousers pocket, thinking it was maybe a thank you note.
We went back home the next day, at home, I remembered getting the note, I rush over, brought out the trouser and opened it, it said “I wouldn’t do this normally because I must be professional as I can, but please, make sure to use a condom. Thanks for the huge tip, I appreciate”. Lol, what’s this? I asked myself, I wanted to tell my wife, so we would laugh about it, thinking maybe the guy thought I just met her and we’re about to go do one or two in an hotel, and since I had tipped him, he decided to pay my good deed back by giving me good health tips, but then, I thought again, what if this is more than what I’m thinking?
Now I needed just more than myself to crack this up, I messaged an old buddy on WhatsApp, he advised I go alone to the city and that same place, meet the guy, sit him down with some bottles and ask him to tell me more. That there might be more to it then what it looks like. I heed to that advice. But when I reached there, that particular person wasn’t anywhere to be found, I didn’t even know his name, I described and described and described to his .colleagues, none of them could help. I now went back home, with so many thoughts and fears, I didn’t even want to think that my wife is cheating on me, but then I didn’t want to just drop the case like that.
I told myself I’d make some investigations myself, and what other way to investigate than checking her messages on social media. This was so hard for me, it was so hard because I’ve never ever thought a day will come I’ll have any need to go through my world’s phone, looking to see if she’s cheating on me.
I checked her WhatsApp chat with her best friend, there was nothing to see, I kept checking, this wasn’t a one day something as I needed time, so she won’t suspect and delete any of her chats. I kept checking, and my biggest fear… I felt like I died, but I resurrected. I acted normal, wanted giving myself some time before confronting my wife. After a week, I did. She has never seen me being suspicious or asking her anything of such, since we met. So she confessed, and told me everything, except one.
She told me about how the guy comes around and they have sex on our matrimonial bed, she told me many other wonderful stories, guys, I swear, I died for some seconds, I never saw this coming my friends. My wife? My flawless baby? Loved by all? Including my immediate and extended family? The woman my dad would always tell me is an esque of my mom? Damn.
I asked her why she was or is doing it she said she doesn’t know, started blaming her village people, saying it could be a curse, and all. I asked her if I don’t satisfy her on bed, she said I’m every girl’s dream man. And guys, I am, really. Because I remember before meeting her, most of the girls I’ve done a thing with always came back for more. So what could’ve been the reason? I needed to know, so I could fix it. Divorce wasn’t even on my mind Because, who could possibly replace her? Also, I have a lot of time for my family, I work for less than 8 hours a day, some times 3 or 4, I had time for my family, a lot of it. So what could be the reason? I didn’t get this answer, so I forgave my baby and promised not to ever make her remember her “past” in any way. We even had some appointments with marriage councilors, and everything was good again, I thought.
My wife kept apologizing daily, telling me how I’m her life, the air she breaths and all, telling me how she couldn’t stay a second without me in her life. We were regaining our marriage back, slowly but steadily.
All this I’ve not told any of my family members, in fact, I’ve not told any one apart from my childhood buddy I told about earlier, seeking advices. So I decided to keep it that way, not telling anyone, so nobody would see my baby in a different way. This buddy I told earlier told me if I don’t think about running a DNA Test on my baby boys. At first I was reluctant because what’s the need? Lol, they’re mine, I’m 100% sure bud. But he kept insisting and I bought it.
I did the test on my first son, Lol, you guessed wrong my friend it came out, I wasn’t the dad. Lol I think at this point I was buried, I could literally remember eating my burial rice. Lol. I kept quiet, my wife was happy again, the guilt wasn’t really showing, I was getting my family back, so how am I going to tell her about this new discovery? What if she commits suicide? She said she’d die if it’s not me.
I did the test on my second son, there were some good news in this one, I was the… Lol, I wasn’t the dad, he wasn’t my son either. My world came to an end, how was I going to tell my dad? A man that thought he had at least seen his first set of grannies before reuniting with his maker? How was I gonna tell my mom, my siblings and even my wife about it?
I kept cool, my wife’s birthday is by November, so November 2021 on her 27th birthday, my family had gone back to much of how we used to be, we did an in-house birthday party, just four of us, after everything I gave her the test results. Lol.
She started crying, cleaning my feet, doing like she has gotten mad, I told her to stand up and sit down let’s talk. She did, asked her why? She said maybe when she was cheating on me she mistakenly took in. But twice? Impossible yeah? Me too. But three different DNAs on two boys, from three different hospitals from three different towns can’t lie.
Had to travel home to tell my family (I had called everyone home that I wanted doing a family meeting). I told them, my old man got hit the most, suffering stroke as a result of the shock. Everyone were devastated, our flawless wife? Can’t be.
I came back home and my wife had packed out with our kids, lol dropping a note, “We don’t deserve you baby”, I don’t want to talk about what I’ve been through since then, but I’ve healed a bit, after almost a year. I lost my job though, they said I haven’t been productive enough. I’m back home, running the business my pops was running for me back home. God bless us all, thank you my friends for reading, have a good night rest.”
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